Dear Cool Japan,
There I am. Hire me. I can do it.
A good friend of mine just sent me an interview with Tokyo Otaku Mode containing the following statement:
Kodaka explained that while there are a lot of otaku news sites in Japanese, there isn’t a site that publishes in English.
To which I said マジデ？！
So you can imagine my surprise at this statement. I believe there is only one possible response to it: I offer myself in service to Cool Japan.
It doesn't matter what kind of Cool Japan thing you hire me for, I promise that I will be great.
I will be グレートだぜ。 Like Josuke.
Do you need me to be a professional foreigner, like the guys who show up on those TV shows? I am very tall. The last time I was in Japan, I came across a gathering of itasha, and I got so excited about those cool cars that everybody was gawking at me. So I can definitely be a professional foreigner, if that's what you're looking for. Wouldn't you like to hire a big Puerto Rican guy to get excited about otaku things? I can be that for you.
Aside from my writing work I am deeply and personally involved in otaku culture. Among other fan activities, I am the author of a popular 4-koma manga about videogames. I hear it even has a few readers in Japan!
I am also the only person who cares about Gatchi-Ota.
In conclusion, Cool Japan needs promotion, and I really miss Japan. This can happen. Let's work something out, Cool Japan.